Beauty Is Your Name

1 Peter 3:3-4: “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles, and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather it should be that of your INNER self, the unfading BEAUTY of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”

I've been noticing how so many women/girls seem to be overtaken by LOOKING a certain way more than BEING CERTAIN of the One Who is LOOKING for a relationship with them. Our TRUE BEAUTY comes from above and no amount of outer appearance will be able to cover up an inner void only meant to be feed by the ONE who made us...GOD! So today I want to share a short story I wrote last year that may help you with evaluating if you are relying on your outer beauty versus your inner beauty. I hope it INSPIRES you to be set FREE...

"I was listening to a song that I use to love to play over and over again – “Beauty” by Dru Hill. There is a part in the song that says, “Cuz my eyes have seen the glory, in the coming of your smile… Walks by me every day, her and love are the same. The woman that's stolen my heart, and Beauty is her name. I'm hoping I can make you mine, 'for another man steals your heart, and once this Beauty is mine, I swear we will never be apart.” Then, the scripture 1 Peter 3:3-4 came to mind, 'Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles, and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather it should be that of your INNER self, the unfading BEAUTY of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.'"

Just in those few moments, I noticed the contrast between God’s view on beauty and the world’s view on beauty.  See everything the singer was singing about had EVERYTHING to do with outer appearance without any reference to the inward beauty of the woman. Sure he saw the beauty of her smile but what did he really know about her other than her outer appearance. Yet he sings that she has stolen his heart and he swears they will NEVER be apart just by her outer beauty.

I remember days when I thought my outer appearance was all that I needed to attract the kind of man, I hoped to marry and live happily ever after. After a few bad episodes with some male fool’s gold, I had to re-evaluate my initial thought. All that seemed to glitter in their lives was definitely not gold. I also was looking at appearances when I was selecting them to date. Men who on the surface had all the right words, appeared to be secure financially, seemed trustworthy in character, appeared to love me and look out for my best interest.

I remember one man telling me if I was his woman I would not be doing this or that. Another telling me if I kept doing whatever it was he didn’t like, that he was going to trade me in for a new model. Then the most memorable act of disrespect was the blatant lie to my face about the woman I could clearly see he was taking on a date.

Some men can make a woman feel like she needs to change this or change that if she is not secure in who she is, but mostly it has to do with how we see ourselves or feel about ourselves prior to any man coming along. We think that the outer beauty is the only thing he will see but we also carry an inner image that is just as evident as the outer image.

Maybe you are thinking you need to have sex with him to keep him, or you need to have bigger breast because he always seems to talk about that as a joke around others, or that you shouldn’t confront him about his wandering eye when you are with him. Take these actions as warning signs that it is time to move on.

Get to know yourself by getting to know God better. When you know what God says about you, no one else can come along and make you doubt what you know for sure. If your relationship with God is not in order, your relationship with anyone else will not be in order.

Outer beauty or any other thing will not be the glue to hold anyone together. We must have the radiant LIGHT of God in us to even attract the type of people that God would have for us. When we have the TRUE INNER BEAUTY of a gentle and quiet spirit it is only by way of the intimate time we have invested with the One who is Ultimate Beauty.

One thing that set me free from trying to manipulate attention towards my outer beauty rather than allowing my inner beauty to validate who I was, I began asking myself some inner questions to help me make decisions regarding my actions:

     1)      Why am I doing this?

     2)      Is this really who I am or am I masking a part of me when I do this?

     3)      How do I feel about myself right now?

     4)      How will I feel about myself after I do this?

     5)      Does this action value who God made me to be?

     6)      Am I devaluing the standards God as set for me to follow?

     7)      Whose approval will I gain with this action...God’s or someone else?

     8)      What does God’s Word say about this?

Beautiful and Beloved one,  you have all the beauty you need as you apply the BEAUTY of God’s Word to your heart and allow it to transform your inner self to a radiant beauty that exudes outwardly. No amount of outward appearance will be able to compare to the attractive beauty of a women exuding the Light of God from within. So allow God to pour His beauty into you then you will later be able to display His beauty to whomever He places in your path…Oh yes, Beauty is your name!

To read more about TRUE BEAUTY, go to... http://cindylumpkin.org/2012/08/in-search-of-true-beauty/

The Right Relationship

 
"If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not have LOVE, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. ² If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have LOVE, I am nothing. ³ And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have LOVE, it profits me nothing.

⁴ LOVE is patient, LOVE is kind and is not jealous; LOVE does not brag and is not arrogant, ⁵ does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, ⁶ does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but REJOICES with the TRUTH; ⁷ bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

⁸ LOVE NEVER FAILS; but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away. ⁹ For we know in part and we prophesy in part; ¹⁰ but when the perfect comes, the partial will be done away. ¹¹ When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things. ¹² For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known. ¹³ But now faith, hope, LOVE, abide these three; but the GREATEST of these is LOVE." (1 Corinthians 13:1-13 NASB)

As a teenager, I was angry.  Others said I had good looks, a shape that stopped men dead in their tracks, high intellect, and an attitude that made others feel somewhat intimidated. After a few heartbreaks and disappointments, my anger grew to bitterness. This bitterness made me appear confident, sarcastic, and honest to a fault, and wanting attention/affection but responding in a way that pushed others away. I often offered help to others but never seemed to get it back in return.

Always looking for love in all the wrong places – men!  Men who were mostly unavailable emotionally and leaving me wanting for more than they would offer. I was hoping that the words coming out of their mouths were true but not trusting that they could ever be true. Using work, men, fashion, and giving as a means to validate who I was.

When, in fact I had low self-esteem. Never quite measuring up to my mother’s standards, I seemed to hold on to the perceived criticisms in my head. My dad being too preoccupied with a life of partying, philandering, and sports to give me the fatherly love that every girl needs and desires.

Still God was in control. The final bad breakup that broke me to the core was with someone I thought to be a friend. He was just playing the game until he had the opportunity to catch me in a vulnerable state to compromise myself to fulfill his goal – sex. After a few years of allowing the booty calls and the unrealized disrespect, I wanted more. I thought it was a relationship with him, but in fact it was my soul crying out for the LOVE of God.

How wonderful it has been to date Jesus. I’ve gotten to know myself better and to know God better. All that energy I seemed to spend on people and things that really couldn’t appreciate or see me for who I am. I am a wonderfully, precious, beloved and great woman of God who is what God says I am – His!

I can do all things through Jesus Christ who strengthens me! With Jesus, I have chosen to walk by the Spirit within me and not by my fleshly emotions…sexually pure, drug and alcohol free, anger managed by God, and believing Jesus will walk with me through life’s struggles as I walk in obedience to His Word – The Bible.

There is nothing like the FREEDOM found in the RIGHT RELATIONSHIP... with God by HIS Love!