"Is Your Love REALLY Love or is it Manipulation?"

(Acts 17:28) - "For in Him we live and MOVE and have our being....We are his offspring."

(1 Corinthians 13:4-8) - "LOVE is PATIENT, LOVE is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love NEVER fails..."

Have you ever tried to get someone to do something you want them to do? Do you believe your actions are best for what you want to achieve? Have a seat and let's examine what may be the root of the issue for this action. 

Quite often we try to move others by our efforts rather than by the efforts of the Spirit. If we are not careful, we may show disrespect to others and to God by not allowing others to be moved in their heart first. Trying to be "Holy Spirit Jr." makes us tired, frustrated, and most of out of the will of God. It proves we are unable to handle what is meant to be done in God's power. If we don't pray and seek God first, we can be tempted to try to manipulate or control others into doing what we want in the time and plan we desire. So why do we do it given the destructive results?

We as women have a big temptation to control things/people in order to get things done in our timing. It is part of the curse placed on us in the garden when God said, "Your DESIRE will be for your husband, and he will RULE over you.” (Genesis 3:16) This scripture shows a biblical example of the submission we are to have towards a higher authority beyond what we want/desire.

There is a reason Self-Control is part of the Fruit of the Spirit. Quite often we try to control others when we are actually called to control ourselves. Maybe we are being called to pray about it instead of say anything about it. Or act loving towards someone who has hurt us. Or maybe patiently listen when we are in a hurry to respond with our answer. Or submit our prayers to the Lord for Him to protect and guide our teenager's choices versus trying to control their every move.

The root of manipulation is fear. Fear that breeds selfishness and power. Fear is an evil lurking in our hearts seeking whom it may devourer. Did you know that manipulation or as the bible calls it the Jezebel spirit is a form of withcraft? Seems a little shocking doesn't it? We don't like to look at for what it truly is. Witchcraft is the practice used to control or have power over others/things. Since God is the only Sovereign being, we were best designed to submit our control over to Him. When we manipulate, we are trying to stand in the place that is reserved for God and His Power.

Manipulation is a tactic of the enemy and will always be revealed for what it is...a deception. When other's realize they are being manipulated the temporary power one believes they have will burn up against the flame of God's Love. Where there is manipulation there is no Peace. There will be evidence of anger, frustration, worry, and all the things that are not part of the Fruit of the Spirit. Peace is from God and is another ingredient of the Fruit of the Spirit. 2 Kings 9:22 tells us, "When Joram saw Jehu he asked, 'Have you come in peace Jehu? HOW CAN THERE BE PEACE,' Jehu replied, 'as long as all the idolatry and witchcraft of your mother Jezebel abound?'”

God often allows frustrations in life as an opportunity to bring us to a point of submission to Him so that we can then be a greater overflow of His Love to others. If this article is speaking to your heart, go before the Lord and ask for His forgiveness and repent. Ask Him to help you to change from this action and begin to reflect the character that looks like His image. Look up scriptures related to Love, control, & power to see what speaks to your heart on the subject. May your search for God's Love enrich and encourage you to a life that has BEAUTY for the ashes of your past actions. STAY in His Blessing!